The One Who Could Save Her
by ThisAccountIsNowInactive354085
Summary: She can fool the others, but she can't fool herself.  Pippicity


**Disclaimer: Nothing's mine but the plot!  
A/N: These two have been a favorite couple of mine so I decided to try and fic them! All characters belong to Libba Bray, of course.**

**The One Who Could Save Her******

_Fee and Pip, Pip and Fee..._****

Felicity choked back the tears that threatened to pour out- she was alone, sprawled face-first on the large rug between her bed and Pippa's. No. Not Pippa's. Not anymore.

"Bloody Gemma Doyle," she dry-sobbed, her fingers curling around the loose edge of the rug. "She hadn't the _right_!" It was all Gemma's fault- if it hadn't been for Gemma, Pippa would never have eaten the berries. __

Lovely, innocent Pippa.

_Her _Pippa.

Felicity's throat ached with the unshed tears but she would never let them free- even alone, she would not compromise herself. She would never be powerless again.

_"All my life, I've been ordered about!"_

_ "Not me, Pip. I never ordered you about."_

The pain had been too much to bear then- Felicity had wanted to sink to the floor and curl up in a ball and sob as the world stopped and waited for her to heal. But time does go on, no matter how hard one wishes it to stop. And Pippa- dear, darling Pip- she had seen the heartbreak (had it been so obvious?) and for just a moment there had been a flash of the real Pip beneath the flames. But even as those lips met her own- even as the blood pumped through her body like fire, she had felt sick, knowing that this Pip- _her _Pip, was gone. As soon as the spell broke, she would become a monster once more.

The monster that the Realms had created- the Beauty that became the Beast.

The Beast, whose one true love could not break the spell.

Felicity tore at the corset at her waist, desperate to be free- if she was only a man- if only she had been a man, she could have made Pippa happy. She would have been her knight in shining armor- the first time the knight had appeared, it torn a hole through Felicity's heart. She could never be that knight but if she could she would have treated Pippa like the princess she was, not a slave as her society-driven mother had treated her.

But she wasn't. She could never be. Not anymore.

Pip had offered her the berries and she had refused- but not for Gemma, nor for Ann. They could never mean so much as her darling Pippa. Why, then?

She had been afraid- yes, the great, charming Felicity Worthington had been afraid, but not of the immortality offered by the berries.

She had been afraid of losing Pippa again. It had hurt so much the first time, and even as she tried and tried to convince herself that it was okay- that she could still visit her Pip in the Realms. But Felicity wasn't as stupid and single-minded as she seemed. She knew that Pippa was slowly leaving her- fading until she was nothing but the shadow of the ghost of her former self and the new Pippa terrified her. Not for her own sake, but for Pippa's. How could she have let her fall so hard? So yes, Felicity was afraid, because no matter what she did- no matter how hard she fought, Pippa was fading away.

Faster, faster, every day.

Felicity hit the floor weakly- what sort of knight stood back and allowed his love to be lost right before his eyes?

And she had- she had stood there and watched as her beloved Pip slipped further and further into the darkness, all the while wishing that Pip would return to her, because the beautiful, frightening creature before her could never be mistaken for Pip.

Beautiful, lovely Pip.

And she hated Gemma for arriving at Spence and ripping her world to bloody tatters- she hated Gemma for pulling her and Pippa into the world that would take Pippa from her forever.

Felicity wished she could rip Gemma Doyle to bloody pieces- wished she could make _Gemma Doyle_ suffer the pain that she had brought, destroying Felicity's life, her world...

Her _Pip._

**PGBR**

Months later, it seemed- had it truly only been minutes?- Felicity stood up, pushing herself off the ground with shaking hands. The tender flesh beneath her nails was bleeding with abuse.

She would never get over Pip, but they didn't have to know- she would plaster on a smile as she had for years already, courtesy of the admiral himself. She smiled wryly- at least Pippa never knew. She would have shunned her, surely- who would want such a broken, sullied degenerate? And for that reason, Felicity had never breathed a word. She reckoned that Gemma knew, but what did she matter?

Nothing. Nothing mattered but Pip, and Pip was gone- Felicity had watched her go. She had found the courage to speak out only a moment too late, and for that, she no longer deserved the wish of becoming Pippa's knight in shining armor.

Truthfully, Felicity knew it was never Gemma's fault- she knew that it was hers for her own inability to become the man that Pippa had desired so desperately. She knew that she had encouraged Gemma- knew that she had begged Gemma to take them with her. Felicity knew that she was a coward- nothing but a small child who had played with fire and run away from the inferno, afraid to get burned.

On the way out of the room, she threw a glance to the mirror only to smile weakly at her shattered reflection. The mirror had been the first to go.

The world could so easily be fooled by Felicity's long, pale locks and fair, innocent complexion, but Felicity could never delude _herself _if she was staring right through the facade. She couldn't blame Gemma when standing before her, cracked and distorted, was the real reason why.

How _could_ she blame Gemma, when she turned to the mirror and Pippa's pleading, violet eyes blinked back at her?


End file.
